Where Are The Songs?

I am a composer who has enjoyed the adventure of discovering new sounds and new structures. This has been true for most of my life, but as I grew older I moved away from the more traditional forms of so-called classical music and pursued what some might think of as experimental sounds, but continued to be based in an emotional, expressive context. Sound in time has been an exploration of feeling, texture and sonority.

From the early days of my music making, my endless improvisations at the piano, I realize that those were my musical "blogs" ---although the concept of blogs was still decades away. These musical outpourings were personal statements that helped shape and define me in an ongoing encounter. At times they would take the forms of "shows"---crystallized with book, lyrics, and music, a more public part of my "musicing."

But there was also a secret part of me that wrote songs. These were very private and I have not really shared them to any great extent. These are songs that are music from the heart, a celebration of love and feeling. The existence of these songs has been tenuous, mostly in my mind, some notated, a number of them lost, and still others forgotten.

I have been attempting to resurrect them into some tangible form, but there are a number of problems from a technical perspective. Some are stuck in a computer without the appropriate software to leap from binary code to be deciphered as music and text. Some are stuck in my head, fragments that need to be reborn and reassembled.

Many of these were my most personal and passionate musical expressions, but now they seem elusive, abandoned through neglect. Now I wonder. Where are the songs?